Quoth the Mockingjay, "Nevermore"

Once upon a Monday dreary, while I worked on revisions, eyes so bleary,
Over many a quaint and curious chapter I had gone over many times before,
While I nodded to SJ Tucker, feet a'tapping, suddenly there came a rapping,
As of some one gently tapping, tapping at my bedroom door.
"Goddamn cats," I muttered, "tapping at my bedroom door —
Wanting food, and nothing more."

Then into my bedroom bursting, my temper within me burning,
Soon I heard again a tapping somewhat louder than before.
"Knock it off cats!," said I, before noticing something at my window sill;
"What the hell?", said I, "I've never seen anything like this before" —
Let me get these hungry cats away from it before this creature becomes nevermore
Before this creature becomes nevermore

Lifted I the window sill, when, with many a flash and flitter,
In my bedroom stepped a Mockingjay; with feathers black and white with which to soar
"You can't be real," I said to he; "You don't exist, you can't be"
"It's a poem, just go with it" said the Mockingjay; "Now listen to what I have to say, or you'll be spoiled to the ending of Mockingjay forevermore"
"Or you'll be spoiled to the ending of Mockingjay forevermore"

Much I stared in horror at this imaginary fowl to hear news so scary,
For I had managed to stay unspoilered, unspoilered since August Twenty-Four;
"But the National Book Festival is coming," the Mockingjay reminded me
"With Suzanne Collins signing and reading, Surely there you will run into spoilers, spoilers galore"
"So no excuses, no more blogs or Twitter, you must read Mockingjay by September Twenty-Fifth or be spoiled forever, forevermore"

But before the Mockingjay could say another word,
My fat orange cat sprang through the air and tackled it to the floor
Madly thrashing, with feathers flashing, the Mockingjay bolted for the window
And with a shout of "Team Katniss" it spread its wings to fly, disappearing into the night as I told myself, "Wait a minute, it's Jabberjays that are supposed to speak"
But the Mockingjay told me not to over-analyze as it faded from sight and I reached for the book I had gotten at the store, so that I could start reading, my hungry cats still ignored

--

My apologies for the long absence, after the awesomeness that was PAYA, I got overwhelmed with work and revisions. OK, the revisions were pretty fun. Work? Not so much. I'll have the final installment of my report from PAYA in the next couple of days, but for now, I've got to get started on Mockingjay, or else!



Update: Thanks to work, and my bothersome need to eat and have a roof over my head, I was only able to get half way through the book before I heard Suzanne Collins speak. Luckily for me, Suzanne very kindly but very firmly announced a 'no spoilers' policy at the beginning of the Q&A session, and when one girl wanted to ask a question about the end of Mockingjay, Suzanne told the girl to talk to her after the session was over. So, spoilers averted, and I finished the book early this morning.