Dear Mom, My Name Is Not Beth Revis

Last year, I got my mother a copy of Beth Revis' Across the Universe. I knew mom would love it. She adores spaceships and sci-fi and when I met Beth during last year's Breathless Reads tour, I got the sense that she and my mom were on the same wavelength, so to speak.

I handed the book to mom and her face lit up. I was thrilled to see her so happy. She looked up at me. "Did you...did you write this?"

My face fell. I pointed towards the cover. "Is my name Beth Revis?"

Mom thought it over for a bit. "But what if that's your pen name? And you didn't tell me you had gotten a book deal because you wanted to surprise me."

I sighed. This wasn't the first time this had happened. The year before, mom had convinced herself that I was Kelly Gay, because apparently our writing styles are similar. "If I ever get a book deal, you'll know, because I'll be the one running up and down the street in my pajamas, screaming, 'Oh my God! Oh my God! I got a book deal!' Trust me on this, you'll know when it happens."

To re-cap:

This is Beth Revis, awesome author of Across the Universe and A Million Suns. She likes Futurama, Firefly, and things that explode. She also had this freaky painting in her hotel room the other night that looked like a bunch of carnivorous Pikachu on valium, which you can see here.



This is me:



OK, maybe this is me:



The point is: Despite our mutual love of Firefly, you'll notice we are not the same person.

As it turns out, Beth is going to be doing a signing in my area tomorrow. I wanted to bring mom with me, to prove I'm not Beth Revis so mom could meet one of her favorite authors in person. Unfortunately, mom's really into eating and paying her bills and had to work instead. I'm still going though! Besides Beth, Andrea Cremer, Marie Lu, and Jessica Spotswood will be there. I'll be sure to get books signed and have a giveaway.

As always, if you have anything in particular you'd like me to get, let me know in the comments.

Breathless Reads: Top Ten

Since my best friend Aine already did a great job covering our trip down to Raleigh for the Breathless Reads book signing, I thought I'd do something a little different and try a top ten list.

We came, we got books signed, we had fun, and here's ten things I learned along the way:

1. You can never find a Cracker Barrel when you need one.

On the way down to Raleigh, we decided to stop at a Cracker Barrel to eat. The sign said there was one up ahead, it promised us a Cracker Barrel. I'm quite sure we didn't imagine it. It took us significantly longer to drive down (7 hrs) than to drive back up (4.5 hrs). You know why? Because we were looking for that frakkin' Cracker Barrel.

It's like they have cloaking devices. Maybe only certain mortals have the ability to see them. A blessing to some, a curse to others, only a chosen few possess the Seventh Sense, otherwise known as the Cracker Barrel Sight.

2. I don't need an iPad, but I do need a better camera.

On the way down, Aine kindly let me play with her iPad. There were two problems with the iPad: I couldn't type fast on it, so I don't think it'd work for writing, and it was addictive as hell. A potentially dangerous combination. As for my camera, I don't really have one right now, so I've been using my cell phone, with mixed results...



I swear, these authors are much less blurry in person.



3. Beth Revis is all about the explosions.

Looking over my notes, I can't tell you how many times the words 'Beth Revis' and 'blow stuff up' appear in close proximity. Also, Beth, who was a school teacher, killed off a bunch of former students in her book. So don't mess with her!

4. Kirsten Miller has the best how-I-got-published story I think I've ever heard.

It goes like this: Kirsten was living in Manhattan at the time. While on her lunch break at work, waiting in line in the cafeteria, a co-worker asked her what her plans were for the weekend. A little embarrassed, she mentioned that she was writing a book. The co-worker said he "knew someone in publishing" and asked to take a look. So she gave him the manuscript, expecting that he'd put it away and never give it a second glance. Except the next day, he got slammed with a terrible case of the flu, so bad that he couldn't get out of bed, and the only reading material within reach was Kirsten's manuscript. Stuck in bed, he read it and liked it enough to pass it on to his friend, who helped Kirsten get published.

The moral of the story: If you're having trouble getting published, maybe you should move to New York City and hang out in random cafeterias.

5. Ally Condie is working on a book for her son's birthday.

According to her young son's very exacting specifications, it has to have animals, but no cats. Cats are forbidden.

6. There were a whole lot of 'jigsaw' writers on the panel.

When I say 'jigsaw', I mean writers who write out of order and piece the scenes together. I think Beth Revis was the only writer who didn't do that. Her style was more linear, one sentence after another, with little to no idea what would come next. I totally understand that, because I've tried the jigsaw method before and it did not work for me.

Brenna Yovanoff, on the other hand, doesn't just write out of order, even her sentences aren't fully formed at first. It's only later that everything is smoothed out and made cohesive. I also thought Brenna had a good piece of advice, in that she talked about the importance of actually finishing stuff. She said that she'd written many fragments of books, but actually finishing one was an entirely different experience.

7. Everybody on the panel has some exciting projects they're working on.

Beth Revis is writing A Million Suns, the sequel to Across the Universe.

Brenna Yovanoff's next book will be called The Space Between.

Kirsten Miller is working on All You Desire, a sequel to The Eternal Ones.

Ally Condie has Crossed, the follow-up to Matched, coming out later this year.

And Andrea Cremer, who has the impressive ability to juggle multiple projects at once, is working on a Steampunk series, a prequel to Nightshade set in the highlands of Scotland in the 1400s, and probably a project or two that I wasn't able to write down. Because that girl's prolific, that she is.

8. The spaceship in Across the Universe is inspired by the Planet Express ship in Futurama.

Also, Beth Revis is a browncoat. I hereby award her 10,000 extra awesome points just for that.

9. Andrea Cremer was obsessed with the name Majesta when she was ten years old.

Andrea says she can't write until the name is right (I'm like that!). While Beth Revis just picks names that she likes. Brenna Yovanoff is a spontaneous namer too.

10. On the subject of names, Kirsten Miller once met a taxi driver named Bedelletrix.

Kirsten immediately decided that she would have a character with that name in one of her books, and that Bedelletrix would be a) a villain b) wear Lee press-on nails c) raise Chinchillas.

Bonus Fun Fact!

Quail Ridge Books, where the book signing was held and which is a surprisingly large indie bookstore in Raleigh that I'd love to visit again, has one of the best bathrooms I've ever seen. If you visit, you really must stop and see the bathroom. You must!

The Swamps of Revision

I have climbed the Mountains of Adversity, wandered the Desert of Rejection, and hacked my way through the Jungle of Self-Doubt. I finally had to stop at the 7-Eleven of Dashed Hopes and get myself a Slurpee (the Slurpee of Everlasting Optimism!) because all this wandering around is exhausting.

So, where am I? I'm currently in the Swamps of Revision. I haven't run into any Rodents of Unusual Size yet but if I see one, I'll let you know. In a later post I'll talk about how those revisions are going, but I really came here to mention that I'll be attending the Breathless Reads book signing in Raleigh tomorrow.

I didn't think I'd be able to make it, but thanks to my best bud Aine and my boss, who's very big on me having a life and getting time off, I'll be there!

For those who don't know about the Breathless Reads tour, there'll be five YA authors at the signing:

-Kirsten Miller - The Eternal Ones
-Brenna Yovanoff - The Replacement
-Andrea Cremer - Nightshade
-Ally Condie - Matched
-Beth Revis - Across the Universe

What an amazing lineup! Kinda wish you were going, don't you? Or if nothing else, maybe you wish someone would get you a book signed? Maybe some nice YA writer who has a beagle and blogs on occasion?...

First person to respond to this post gets their pick. Tell me which book you want and who you want it made out to. And if you respond too late, no worries, there'll be more contests.

Update: Congrats, Harmony! I'll be putting your signed copy of Across the Universe in the mail in the next few days.

Never fear, I also got a copy of Andrea Cremer's Nightshade for a future giveaway!